


Hush! R.O.B. is listening

by pinkjester



Category: One Piece
Genre: Akuma no Mi | Devil Fruit, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Chaos, Fix-It of Sorts, How Do I Tag, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Random Omnipotent Being aka ROB, Self-Indulgent, Self-Insert, i don't know what to tag, stereden's Discord Server, stereden's One Piece Universe
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-12-20
Updated: 2021-01-12
Packaged: 2021-03-10 20:34:21
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,377
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28203180
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/pinkjester/pseuds/pinkjester
Summary: Many things are made to be broken. Glowsticks, piñatas, the souls of your enemies, and most importantly canon.Welcome to the story of Jester, a member of the Discord Pirates, and how they came together to wreck mayhem in the One Piece Universe
Relationships: Shakky & Original Character
Kudos: 21
Collections: Scattered in Pieces (yet we are One)





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [Watashitachi wa Roger kaizoku desu (we still stand proud)](https://archiveofourown.org/works/14884211) by [stereden](https://archiveofourown.org/users/stereden/pseuds/stereden). 



> I rated this M because I don't know how dark or graphic this may get. Probably not a lot and I'm being overly cautious. FOR SURE there will be NO SMUT in here. I can promise you that. The violence? Uh, I don't know yet. Should I move this back to Teen? (this is my first rated M fic can you tell?)
> 
> Anyway I hope you enjoy as much as I do!

As the sun reached its peak on Guanhao Island, a plume of smoke appeared on the shoreline. When the air cleared, a young girl remained standing. She looked around her with a confused frown.

Silver eyes widened as the girl seemed to recall something. She began to frantically search for something. “Where was the letter? There was supposed to be a letter! It had all the important information I needed to know like my location, the year! I signed up for this as a joke!”

She collapsed onto her knees and glanced at a light green-ish object. It appeared to a former kiwi or oval shaped thing. But now it was lime colored with fancy swirls. The girl buried her fingers in her black hair and muttered, “ If I’m getting isolated alone without any help, I’m going to yeet myself in the ocean and cry. Oh my gosh, I’m going to die. I want to go home.I am regretting every single decision I have ever made.”

Before the young girl could spiral even more, a pebble dropped from the sky and smacked her on the forehead. Her head snapped up and glared at the sky. “Hey! Who did that?”

She blinked once. Twice. Thrice. “This never happened!” she spluttered, red-faced. Apparently, the letter had been taped on her forehead the entire time. The girl winced slightly when she yanked the letter off her face and began to read.  
  
Dear Jester,

As you may have noticed, your wish to be Isekai-ed into the One Piece universe has been fulfilled. Ok, it wasn’t really a wish but who cares? You and I along with your companions and their guardians will be having a lot of fun. No more mundane living! Whoop whoop! 

AND because I'm feeling peculiarly benevolent, I'm going to leave you with one last freebie. You have been de-aged to a 10 years old and get to eat the Devil Fruit you have come up with. This should be more than enough time for you to train and level up. 

The Island you landed on is Guanhao which is nowhere near Mariejois. No more freebies for you. Though I did leave a little companion animal for you somewhere. Whether you find it or not is entirely up to you. Yes, I know you wanted to land there to commit some arsonist deeds, but no. My entertainment is not allowed to die so easily. In fact, for that very reason, I have also slowed your aging. You’re welcome.

I dropped you off roughly twenty years before Gol D. Roger's head went splat on the execution platform. The exact year is 1480. Now, best of luck to you, have fun, and remember.

Keep me Entertained.

Yours Truly,  
Random Omnipotent Being.  


Her jaw dropped and she spluttered incoherently. “What the- I can’t even-”

* * *

Once she had recovered from her shock, the girl brushed sand off her clothes and undertone blue hair. After pocketing the letter, she picked up the devil fruit and hesitantly took a bite.

She gagged immediately, barely swallowing a bite of the fruit in time. Thank Oda for making sure I only had to eat one bite of this vile thing, she thought. It tasted like soap mixed with candle wax and dirt. The texture was extremely gritty and ashy. As she swallowed, her throat felt like she was drinking icy water after eating twenty billion mints.

“I’m never doing that again. Not that I could without exploding. Wait.... Rob made me immortal so technically I could? Right? But if it doesn’t, I’ll end up being a mysterious puddle. I guess this experiment can happen later after I find some friends,” the girl mused aloud.

She turned towards the fourth wall and narrated, “If I’m in the world of One Piece where logic doesn’t work properly, I’m going to take advantage of that and make foolish decisions. And if you’re wondering why I’m not having a breakdown, it’s because I have priorities and I’m great at ignoring my problems.”

The climate of this island wasn’t that bad. As she traveled deeper into the forest, the girl was immensely grateful that her R. O. B. wasn't ruthless enough to drop her on a winter island to freeze on like others would have done. She stopped walking to scratch my shin again. “I’m still not a fan of grass though.”

A loud crack sounded behind her. “Nope! Not today, Satan!” Jester cried and began to run away blindly from the sound. A foolish mistake, considering that she proceeded to trip and roll when the ground shifted downwards violently. She grasped anything she could reach to. Grass, stones, roots. But none of them helped to slow her down. Her head bumped into a rock and her vision went black.

* * *

When the girl came to, she recognized the sound of machines beeping. Groggily, Jester looked around and noticed that she was in an infirmary.

A slim woman wearing a white coat appeared in my field of vision. “Hello? Can you hear me?” When Jester nodded slightly, she scribbled something down.

She slowly sat up, rubbing her face. A tall figure dressed in white and wearing a tribal mask stepped into the room. The girl shrunk away and eyed him warily. “What’s your name, child?”  
“You can call me Jester. Where am I? What happened?”

“We found you unconscious with a bump on your head at the bottom of a very steep hill by our headquarters. There have been no ships sighted near this island. How did you get here?” The Cipher Pol agent replied.

“I’m not sure. It’s really hard to- I can’t remember. By the Seas, I can’t remember! I know I was playing around with my devil fruit, but I don’t- what happened?” Jester lied, acting more hysterical by the second.

The doctor circled over. “ Calm down. Take a deep breath. Your devil fruit? What do you mean?”

Jester gulped and nodded. “Yeah, I’m not sure how I got here, but I know what my powers are. I can play around with people’s memories. Erase, add, share, and maybe more. I haven’t had the chance to really experiment with them… I think I tried them on myself.”

The adults exchanged glances before walking off to the corner whispering softly. Jester stayed in the bed, putting on a nervous look on her face and hoping her ploy would pay off. After a few moments, they came back.

“You are quite lucky that the World Government saved your life. Or more specifically, Cipher Pol did. I believe you owe us now,” the masked man stated.

In a wobbly voice, the girl replied, “I do?”

The adults nodded solemnly. “If we hadn’t found you, the wild animals in the forest would have eaten you. Or worse, you may have died from your injuries.”

“That is why we are taking you in. You are in a debt and that needs to be repaid. It is an honor to become a servant of the World Government. Maintaining the balance is no easy job. Now, come along, child. Let’s get started,” the Cipher Pol agent added.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jester makes her Cipher Pol debut and gains a mentor.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello everyone!  
> I hope you like this chapter. I know I do and I had fun writing this. Shakky's probably OOC but welp.  
> This is still kind of setting up the background and basic information, but the fun stuff is coming up soon.

**Year: 1485**

A dark hooded figure landed silently in the courtyard of a noble’s summer home in the middle of the night. According to her sources, a large clan of warrior nobles had been residing here. As the Cipher Pol assassin slunk around the manor purposefully, she recalled the facts. 

Fact 1: The Gorosei wanted them dead after rumors about the said clan declaring themselves above Celestial Dragons.

Fact 2: These people are trash. They owned slaves, took pleasure in hurting innocents, and were no better than the Celestial Dragons. 

Fact 3: The Children were just as bad. They willfully set animals on fire for fun among other heinous crimes. Anyone who tried to reason with them got executed. 

Thus, Jester had no qualms about completing this mission. She had been observing them for over two weeks and their behavior had been consistent. If they showed no mercy to the weak, she would show none to them. 

As she fixed the last trap in place, Jester stepped back satisfied. Every door, window, and vent have been locked so the entire place is now inescapable. Slipping off her gloves, she went to the first bedroom and began inserting the memories. 

The memories of slaves, tortured prisoners, the burning animals that these people hurt. All filled with agony, pain, and hatred. The assassin hadn’t just been passively watching during those two weeks. She had been secretly helping the wounded and burying the dead. Earlier this evening, after everyone had fallen asleep, she had ordered all the prisoners to escape so they wouldn’t get caught in the crossfire. 

As she ran quickly from person to person, invading their minds with pain, screams began. Once she was certain that everyone, _everyone_ , was infected, Jester leaped up to the rafters in the open living room. 

Sitting back in safety, she watched the carnage unfold. Blinded by their victims' hatred, those so-called warriors attacked one another. If the show wasn’t this bloody, Jester would have been tempted to pull out a bag of popcorn and film with her Den Den Mushi. But it was and these people were horrid. So instead, she watched coolly. 

Hours later as dawn cracked, the screams and sounds of fighting stopped. Jester jumped down and the bodies provided a landing pad. She proceeded to inspect every crook and cranny of the manor, making sure there were no survivors. There shouldn’t be any, and if there were any, they would be very much traumatized. 

Fortunately or unfortunately, depending on whose side one was on, there were none. With that, Jester unlocked the trap on one of the windows and used armament haki to escape. 

When the press found out about this, they called it a massacre, a killing spree, a demon’s playground. _They weren’t wrong about the last one_ , Jester mused. Specialists explained that the minds of the “victims” were ravaged, cracked, broken. And with that, she became dubbed as “MindBreaker” Jester. 

  
  
  
  


* * *

  
  
  


A few months later, she was given some time off as a reward before she was to travel to Guanhao, Cipher Pol’s training facilities, and mentor some younglings. In civilian’s clothes, or what Jester called her future pirate clothes, she strolled through Sabaody Archipelago.

The difference in wearing an oversized pink streetwear jacket and black jeans compared to wearing a pristine white tuxedo suit, flowing cape, and surgical mask was enormous. People ignored and bumped into her without freezing in fear. Of course, that meant she had to bundle up, especially her hands, if she wanted to prevent getting any memory overload induced migraines. But overall, she was enjoying herself. 

After shopping for a few books and enjoying the scenery, her stomach growled. Lunch, she decided, shall take place at Shakky’s Rip-Off Bar. It was refreshing to be able to walk into a room and remain unnoticed. By most at least. 

There was no doubt that the owner of the bar knew who she was the moment she walked in. Perhaps she even knew the moment Jester had stepped onto the island. After all, Black Web Shakky wasn’t one of the best information brokers for nothing. 

After she had taken a seat at the counter, Jester opened the menu and began reading. Putting out her cigarette, Shakky narrowed her eyes at the teenager. “MindBreaker Jester, What brings you here?”

The addressed person merely looked up from the menu a short moment before going back. “Lunch.”

A pause. “May I have a plate of Sea King stir fry and a glass of lemonade?” 

Once her lunch was served, Jester elaborated. She had priorities after all. Food is important. “I’m here to offer you a deal, Black Web Shakky.”

At her inquisitive look, the teen went on, “You know who I am. Who I work for. Where my authority reaches. And the gold mine of information I alone have access to.”

“Cipher Pol Aigis Zero,” Shakky acknowledged, lighting up a new cigarette. “And you are offering this because?”

_Oh my gosh, you are so bad at this. This better work, idiot_ , thought Jester. Hopefully, on the outside, her face and voice betrayed nothing. “In exchange for your mentorship on being an information broker and spy, I will give you information about the World Government. The Will of D, Ohara, the like. Perhaps even the whereabouts of certain pirate captains.” 

Shakky said nothing. She closed her eyes and let out a breath of smoke. Jester bit her lower lip and began to bounce her right leg. The information broker continued to smoke and ignore the tsunami of anxiety before her. 

“Deal. But I’m going to need some things first.” Jester wilted like an overwatered cactus in relief. 

“What’s your name?”

“Jester, PJ, Take your pick,” she shrugged. 

“What do you mean?”

“In this world, only the Discord Pirates call me PJ. But half of us haven’t been isekai-ed yet. Everyone else knows me as Jester. Why do you ask?” Jester replied, finally digging into her lunch. 

“Considering the World Government knows your name, I can’t go around calling for my apprentice on less secure Den Den Mushi lines. Let’s call you… Jasper. It’s close enough to your name that you’ll respond to it and far enough that the Marines won’t connect the dots. How old are you kid?”

“Depends on what aspect you’re asking,” was the mumbled reply around a mouthful of food.

She swallowed and wiped her mouth. “I should be fifteen, but I age slowly. _Thank you R. O. B._ Hence the childlike appearance. I’m mentally around twenty-five years old.”

Surprisingly, Shakky accepted all this information without asking any more questions. The teen was probably going to get grilled later. Or perhaps Shakky already knew. Either way, she handed Jester a White Den Den Mushi with a pink shell. “Use this for reports or emergencies. Come to the bar at least every other week for lessons.” 

Glancing at a new customer, Shakky added, “When you’re done with your meal, go to the kitchen and we’ll start your first lesson. You really need to learn some skills on bargaining and interrogation.” before moving away. 

Jester beamed. “Looking forward to it!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading! Feel free to kudos and comment! <3

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading!


End file.
